Sunday, 10 February 2008

2007_10_01_archive



Getting Caught Cheating by Your Girlfriend's Friend

In the last edition we discussed what to do if you get caught by your

girlfriend, that's obviously the worst that could happen. If you get

caught by someone else you have some options available to you. From

here on out things get easier, in comparison to the aforementioned

predicament.

As always, it all depends on who catches you. Today we will discuss

how to handle one of your girlfriend's friends getting wise to your

infidelity.

Caught by Your Girlfriend's Friends

If a friend of your girlfriend's catches you, your woman will know by

the end of the day, thus it's imperative that you act quickly and

decisively. If you know that you have been caught, you can try to

reason with this friend but it`ll most likely fall upon deaf ears

since her allegiance is to your girlfriend, not to you. You can tell

the friend that you know what you did was wrong, and to allow you a

chance to tell your girlfriend personally, since you think it should

come from you rather than someone else. To certain people this might

actually make you seem somewhat contrite and hopefully they will grant

you this favor, and save them the awkward situation of having to

reveal this information themselves.

But how is this any different than the friend telling your girlfriend,

after all she will find out either way, right? Well, right and wrong.

Yes, she will find out, but it if you want to have any hopes of

salvaging your relationship then it is far more important that it

comes from you. Somehow there is some sort of virtuous feeling

involved if you take it upon yourself, plus most women would rather

find out from their significant other rather than from a third party.

Finally, and most importantly, this will allow you to spin the story

in whatever direction you need to save your relationship.

By personally confessing your sins to your girlfriend you will catch

her off guard and you will have a chance to tell her your "story"

while she is still in shock and disbelief. But if she finds out from a

third party, by the time she gets to you she will have had plenty of

time to build up her anger and she will be seeking to release that on

you. She won't care what you have to say since she will be far too

upset to listen.

Also, if YOU tell her, it will save her the public embarrassment of

having someone else tell her, giving the situation an air of

discretion.

Remember as long as you control the information you can soften the

blow by selectively revealing and camouflaging aspects of your

indiscretions, as opposed to your girlfriend getting the gory

embellished details from her friend. By the time it gets discussed

between the two of them the focus will be on your girlfriend's pain

and healing rather than what actually happened, which can make the

difference in saving your relationship.

All your girlfriend needs to know is that you were unfaithful, the

details can and should be minimized by you. Damage control, take the

initiative and tell her yourself, but only tell her what you want her

to know.

I will continue the If You Get Caught Cheating On Your Girlfriend

series with circumstances that offer a greater opportunity for you

save your relationship with your girl.

Stay Tuned.

Take Care,

A.C.

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Labels: If You Get Caught Cheating On Your Girlfriend

Friday, October 5, 2007

If You Get Caught Cheating On Your Girlfriend Part 1

All right, worst-case scenario: you get caught. I have two words for

you; crisis management. What you'll have to do (and quickly I might

add) is to minimize the crisis as much as possible.

I know this is a situation that you probably don't even want to think

about, let alone plan for. But any good player knows they must have a

contingency plan in place for the most unfortunate of circumstances.

You should be prepared for the worst and if that never comes to

fruition, then you can consider yourself lucky that you weathered the

storm.

Chances are the more you cheat, the more the odds will stack up

against you. You're better off mentally preparing yourself for the

inevitable, as well as having a plan to fall back on, instead of

standing there with you mouth agape, flushed with embarrassment with

an inability to say anything in your defense.

At this point information is your best friend. You'll have to find out

how you got caught, who saw you, how much they saw, how much they

know, and most importantly whether your girlfriend knows about it yet.

First things first, it all depends on who catches you. This might seem

immaterial since the truth of the matter is that you have been

exposed, but you have some options depending on whom you are

discovered by.

Caught by Your Girlfriend

This is again, obviously the worst-case scenario, that's why I am

addressing it first. If your girlfriend catches you, in most instances

you are screwed and your relationship is over. However, it depends on

the degree to which you are caught with your pants down, if you will.

If she only finds traces of another girl, perhaps some panties or a

romantic letter, then you might be able to deceive her into believing

that those are left over from a previous relationship that you kept as

a memento.

You might be able to fast talk her out of leaving you since she does

not have irrefutable evidence that you actually slept with someone

else, therefore she does not have the graphic image of you engaging in

a sexual act with another woman. That is very important since the

mental image of you with another woman will live with her forever.

If previous relationship memento leftover lie does not apply, then you

can try and own up to some of your infidelity by admitting that some

new girl had been showing you interest and somehow managed to catch

your attention. But you realized that it was wrong and have put a stop

to it, and that you were trying to find the right time to talk about

it. This will still keep the door open, however slightly, to

reconciliation and perhaps your girlfriend's forgiveness.

But if your girlfriend finds a used condom or walks in on you engaging

in sexual activity with another girl, it's over. She will have that

image in her mind and it will forever burn in her memory making it

unbearable for her to remain in a relationship with you. You might as

well save yourself the time and indignity of groveling for her

forgiveness; accept that you made a mistake and move on.

As for the girl you got caught with, if she doesn't know you have a

girlfriend, you can kiss her goodbye as well. You cheated on your

girlfriend with her, making her feel like a home wrecker, so why would

she want a relationship with you after that? You already demonstrated

your unfaithfulness to your girlfriend, why would she think you would

be true to her?

With the doomsday scenario addressed, I will continue the If You Get

Caught Cheating On Your Girlfriend series with circumstances that

offer a greater opportunity for you save your relationship with your

girl.

Stay Tuned.

Take Care,

A.C.


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