sexy holiday treat my fantasy

A sexy holiday treat: My Fantasy Girlfriend - Diana Darvey

The delectable Diana was probably the first flesh-and-blood woman that

I fell in lust with (after I'd got over my puppet gang-bang with the

Spectrum Angels, that is). For 2 or 3 years in the mid-70s she was the

Principal Crumpet on the notorious Benny Hill Show.

She wasn't then - and isn't now - at all my usual type, physically.

Blonde hair and a full bosom don't have much of a hold on me.

Honestly!! However, she had something........

Diana was much more than just the usual non-speaking eye-candy on the

show; she was a very smart and talented lady who sang songs and acted

opposite Benny in his skits - virtually a co-star for a while. Theatre

was in her blood (her mum had been a chorus girl at the famous

Windmill Theatre in London), and she'd been on the stage since she was

a teenager. She spent several years performing in cabaret reviews in

Spain before Benny "discovered" her in a Madrid nightclub and brought

her back to England to appear on TV with him. She could sing and dance

well, was a decent comedy performer, and spoke Spanish (and French,

and a little bit of German and Italian, too, I think) fluently, and

with a good accent. And, of course, she was smokin' hot! Her sudden

disappearance from the show was one of the great mysteries and

disappointments of my childhood.

I have learned that she also designed her own costumes for the show

(I'd always assumed that Benny himself - the lecher supreme - had been

behind them). Those phenomenal backless (and often virtually

frontless) dresses of hers were etched on my pre-pubescent mind.

Sadly, Diana died a few years ago, while still only in her 50s.

At present, there are only two clips of her on YouTube. Perhaps more

will be posted eventually; she appeared with Benny numerous times, and

on quite a few other British TV shows of the period as well.

For now, here is one of her biggest musical numbers from The Benny

Hill Show (possibly the only time he allowed her to perform straight,

without having some of his comedy schtick going on in the background)

- a medley based around the Frank Sinatra classic, 'Travelling'. Ah,

this takes me back....