my girlfriend is insane

My Girlfriend Is Insane

To be completely honest, I am not that good in relationships and last

night I finally figured out why: I am incapable of arguing like a

civilized human being.

See, my girlfriend is being crazy again, as she tends to be from time

to time. The details are not necessary here, but long story short, she

is being insane. She tends to do this about once a month and ruins any

goodwill I have built up towards her since the last time she went

insane.

Anyway, we are arguing on the phone last night and she calls me a

jerk. I told her I hope she dies alone. I realized that was kind of

harsh.

A few minutes later, she said I was an asshole. I countered with, "You

are so fucking insane, good luck finding another man who will put up

with all of this crap."

I think I added something about no one being at her funeral except the

ghost of her dead cat.

My problem is that I am incapable of throwing out small insults

instead of atomic bombs. When I should say, "You are mean," it tends

to come out "I'm glad your mother is dead."

I found I had the same problem with my landlord. She complained that I

left my laundry basket out in the hallway of my house, so I told her

to go fuck herself and I was counting the days until I could leave

"this hell hole you call a house."

I am not exagerrating.

Oh well.

Vomited Out By StegoSaurus at 9:33 AM